 Written by:
Jacquline Stahl
One of my earliest teaching positions was at a Public School in New York City. I taught over three hundred and fifty students a week, with 32-35 students assigned to a class. I was the head of the Theater Department and the only Drama teacher on staff. After the first couple of weeks, I realized that memorizing hundreds of names and faces would be just one of the many challenges I’d face every day.
My classes were held in an auditorium, which housed the main stage. I referred to it as the sacred space, which prompted all who entered to lower their voices. Attendance was well received, because I sang my students names out loud (which in turn embedded them into my long term memory). For example, one of my student’s names was Roland. I would sing “Roland, Roland, Roland by the River!” Surprisingly, the kids laughed every time I attached music to their name.
Yet, the most magical part of my teaching experience was the warm up. I began every class with shavasana (“corpse pose”). The students quietly arranged themselves in a circle on the stage with just enough space to stretch out, palms open. After the giggles and anxious chatter subsided, I would guide them through a visualization and breath work. Then, we would all sit in some variation of lotus pose and collectively meditate. It really didn’t matter if the student was in 6th grade, 8th grade or a second semester senior. They wanted to be there. They looked forward to being still. One 6th grade boy, who was sent daily to the office for acting out in his other classes, sent me a letter. He wrote: “Dear Jackie, Thank you for letting me quiet the dragon inside of me long enough to see the peaceful me resting there all along.”
I have incorporated meditation, breath-work and mindfulness techniques into my work for many years. I have observed my students and clients connect with a part of themselves that is already healed, strong and aware. When our minds are at peace, our work and our intentions are genuine. As we become internally quieter, our capacity for self-observation deepens. We then have the capacity to tap into our own reset button.
We live in a world that wrestles with time and the pressures of being productive and successful, and we forget that through our breath and awareness, anxiety loses its weight. We can choose to simply surrender, to practice and to gracefully change.
So much is possible when we are able to be still, quiet our minds and communicate from the center of our existence. May we all open our minds before opening our mouths.
Namaste.
Jacqueline Stahl
 Written by: Edwige Gilbert
Every year on December 31st, people all over the world make New Year’s resolutions. Millions of people wake up thinking, “This is the day I am going to do things differently!” They yearn for a new beginning and hate themselves when, after a few weeks, their resolutions fail.
Why do they fail? Because in trying to bring about change in their lives, people reach for the only tool they think they have: willpower, forcing themselves to change. Most often, unfortunately, the will fights back…and wins.
Look at dieting for example. In America, about 109 million dollars are spent on dieting and on diet products every day (Us department of Health and Human Services). Nearly two thirds of Americans are overweight. 25 percent of American men and 45 percent of American women are presently on a diet. Sadly, only 5 percent will lose the weight and keep it off.
What is wrong in the picture? Why is it so difficult to change?
Change is only possible when we begin to understand that it is futile to willfully struggle against our habitual patterns of behavior. You see, we are creatures of habit. Our mind does anything it can to keep us in our comfort zone, away from the unfamiliar and the uncomfortable. This is known as the ”pain/pleasure principle,” which is being experienced when the mind automatically moves us away from pain and toward pleasure and ease. When we tell ourselves, “I should go on a diet,” “I must…," or "I have to...,” immediately, our minds perceive it as painful and react by effectively stopping us from making our desired change. In other words, it is the mind’s protective mechanism that seeks to return us to our comfort zones, even when that acquired comfort zone is unhealthy and potentially harmful in the long run.
So what are we to do? Are we doomed to remain prisoners of our unwanted habits and behaviors? Not at all. The secret is to make our minds enjoy what we desire to change.
Change your focus and you shall change your reality. Simply choose to focus on your desired outcome, engaging the power of your imagination and of positive emotions. This means picturing having reached your desired goal, feeling good about yourself, feeling proud, in charge of your life again, liberated from the past and victorious.
It is strongly believed that the mind does not know the difference between what is real or just imagined. So take advantage of this, and begin to “think yourself changed!" The actual process is simple and is divided into three components:
First, develop a deep state of relaxation, called “Alpha,” an indispensable state to access the subconscious, which is also considered to be the only part of the brain where the seed for a new desired habit can be planted.
Second, in this peaceful state, get ready to project on an imaginary mental screen, which I call the “screening room,” all the vivid details of your new desired behavior. The more specific your visualization is the better. It will ensure the success of this practice.
Finally, in the last stage, remember to include powerful, positive words which I like to consider “declarations," that when repeated will not only create a hypnotic response, but will also, in the future, activate the memory of this joyful experience. The words I recommend to use are: “I choose to create this experience, I believe that I can, victory to me, victory is mine."
Be aware that repetition is critical to the success of the “screening room” practice. Neuroscience tells us that daily repetition for 21 days is what is recommended to create a new pathway to the brain, responsible for our new habitual pattern of behavior.
No doubt, this is powerful material to absorb and can be challenging at first. Realizing that transformation begins in our minds, knowing that thoughts create our destiny and that we have the power to become the master of our lives, can also be the ideal way to begin the year. For a change, prepare yourself to throw out the “gotta, oughts, should’s” part of your resolution, and instead decide to embrace the “I choose.. I desire... I can… I do...”. This will lead you to victory and success in your life.
Learn how to incorporate PINK into all aspects of your life, from what you eat, to what you wear, to how you feel. PINK is the color of UNCONDITIONAL LOVE. The more you surround yourself with PINK, the more LOVE you will experience for yourself and in your life. Learn a wonderful Watermelon Salad recipe and a few other fun tips to get you started. By: Betsy Karp,
The COLOUR COACH
Have a COLORFUL Day!
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 Written by: Jacqueline Stahl
A letter to my late, first husband and the amazing magician, Harvey Cohen
Dear Harvey:
I thought about you so much this past weekend. I took an Amtrak train up to Albany, boarding the last train leaving Penn Station. A snowstorm was predicted and transportation was shutting down for the rest of the day. The sky was gray and the snow was falling as I looked out the window at the frozen Hudson River.
We took that train ride many times together and you would say to me "this is one of the most scenic rides in the world."
You loved storms almost as much as you loved to WOW people. There was nothing more gratifying to you than that look of surprise on someone's face as you double lifted a card into oblivion, or when you made someone believe that a metaphysical miracle was happening and they were a part of it.
I laughed out loud on the train thinking about the time we were invited to Betsy Karp’s Birthday dinner at a little restaurant on Leroy St. She invited a few friends and a couple of people she worked with. One of them was an annoying little man who had a big mouth. He was outspoken and full of himself and you were trying to conceal your boredom by bending spoons and rearranging the sweet and low.
Every few minutes you would wrap your foot around the leg of “Big Mouth’s” chair and give it a delicate tug, while pretending to listen intensely to the conversation. I watched as the poor guy constantly glanced behind himself, glaring at a passing patron or a waiter.
You continued to discretely push and jerk his chair till he finally said: "Someone keeps bumping into me god damn it!" Everyone assured him that no one was doing that, at least not purposefully. I nudged you, silently pleading for you to stop, and you just smiled and gave me the dancing eyebrow response.
The wait staff circled round our table, a clear distance away from your victim. A well-frosted cake was placed in front of Betsy as everyone sang Happy Birthday, and you just couldn't stop yourself. You somehow were able to secure the bottom of his chair with both of your sneakers and lift him in mid-air, dropping him with a Bang. He screamed, "That's it! This place is possessed!" He left in a big hurry and without any cake.
The staff, the guests and our table were convinced that evil spirits had tormented this guy. When you finally revealed your harmless charade, everyone was hysterical. Turned out no one else liked him either.
Harvey, Happy Birthday! I miss laughing with you.
Your three most profound miracles--Jena, Brett and Katie--miss you so much and they carry your magic deep inside. Keep watching over your girls.
We all love you!
Happy Birthday Harv!
Love,
Jackie
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 Written by: Betsy KarpStarting something new is very challenging and can be a test of your resiliency. It takes a lot of belief, patience, faith and a really big dose of courage. ORANGE is the COLOR of courage and it is all around me right now. My screen saver is a bright ORANGE and I’ve been eating so many ORANGE foods filled with beta-carotene and healthy nutrients, giving me that internal boost. Sometimes, in the darkest of times, when you just want to give up is when you have to be your strongest, telling yourself it's going to be OK and to take it Step-by-Step. Let go of the control and release it to the universe. Trust that there is a higher calling and a greater good, and that the universe has your back. It’s a step-by-step process of putting one foot in front of the other. Taking action and doing something everyday is what gets you results, and I mean EVERY DAY action. It can be the littlest thing like answering an email that you have been putting off. JUST DO ONE SMALL THING EVERY DAY! By taking action we learn, we grow and we adjust. It’s in the doing that progress occurs. Don’t wait to make it perfect. Just do it and make adjustments as you go. As we move the universe moves with us. Fear pushes us to move forward. Without fear we wouldn’t grow or do very much. We need some fear in our lives, but the key is to embrace our fears with love. This is when the breakthroughs and the “ah ha” moments happen. Life is a process. It is about building and taking that step, after step, after step, and not giving up even when you want to. It’s the small steps that get us to where we want to be. Without them we really can’t move forward. Let and allow the feelings to come up and know that LOVE is the only way you want to be. Each step and movement feeds on the next. Sometimes it takes a really long time to get there. Everything comes in the right time and in its divine order if you keep moving forward Step-by-Step. So how do we find love for ourselves and get out of fear? It’s about taking a deep breath and getting calm within. It’s about letting go of the ego and the perfectionism of how it’s all going to end up. It’s learning how to just be and accept all that is in this precious moment. Unleash the negative, bratty voices and focus on the positive. Make that call you have been putting off for days (maybe even weeks) and connect with an old friend or business associate. Ask for help and support. Just do ONE thing! People can’t read your mind and know what you need. Reach out and ask someone for help. It’s amazing how everyone wants to help if they can. I have been connecting with so many people and asking for help in the last few weeks. I am amazed at the synchronicity of it all. For example, I am about to launch my i adore me Kids Program. With this on my mind, I bumped into someone today I hadn’t seen in years. Her husband, also a friend, is in the NYC school system. How perfect is that? Everything comes in the RIGHT TIME, so I decided to reach out and ask for his help. I now have an appointment with his son’s principal to discuss my i adore me Kids Program. Now, none of this would have happened if I didn’t pay attention to the signs, reach out and make that call, asking for help and being open to connect. Life is about giving and receiving. Be in the moment and make it happen. Connecting and sharing our life and love with others helps us to feel and find the love within us. It's good to be vulnerable. It's real. Be the authentic you. Don’t be afraid. Get out of your own way and share: connect and communicate, and do it all with LOVE…Step-by-Step. Now doesn’t that feel better?! *Please comment below and share with your friends.* Have a Colorful Day, Betsy Karp, Founder of i adore me
 Written by: Katie Cohen
I just watched The Little Mermaid. Sprawled across the living room floor, I imagined that my legs were a beautiful green tail, gleaming against the ocean’s seabed. My short blonde bob had transformed into spaghetti length locks of fiery red that danced and twirled as I swam toward my father’s antique leather chair, which closely resembled King Tritons throne. Suddenly, the sky cast a dark shadow over my ocean, inviting the evils of the sea to emerge from their hiding places and to create the most violent storm. King Triton told me that if I could make my way across the ocean without stepping on any sea urchins, or without swimming into any dark holes, that the storm would vanish. However, if I failed to follow his advice, the angry storm would strengthen and destroy my entire sea world.
For several days, I did everything in my power to avoid the sea urchins and dark holes that King Triton warned me about. Whether I was playing the role of Ariel in The Little Mermaid or just being Katie, I still had an awful feeling in the pit of my stomach that something terrible was going to happen if I didn’t listen to the king. Eventually my six-year old Disney fantasy and my reality became interchangeable, and stepping over sea urchins manifested into the exhausting obsession of jumping over the street cracks of downtown Manhattan. This was my first experience with anxiety. Of course, I did not understand the significance of my neurotic rituals at the time or that I was becoming controlled by my thoughts.
Thoughts. The very things that allow us to create, to grow, and to distinguish ourselves as individuals. However, when fueled by anxiety, they reveal their destructive nature, often leaving people crippled and enslaved by their irrational thinking processes. Fortunately, as the masters of our minds, we have a choice. We can allow ourselves to be consumed by our fears or we can conquer them before they conquer us. While it’s easier said than done, it is possible. Take it one day at a time. Today, I will choose to step ON the street cracks.
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 Written by: Katie Cohen
 Written by: Steven M. Goldsmith
Isn't it amazing how we create stories in our lives and hold onto them? We create stories about situations and relate to those stories rather than what actually happened. And if you pay close enough attention, you'll notice that that's how you relate to people as well...to your story about them rather than who they are. Wouldn't this world be a better place if we had authentic relationships instead?
How do you let go of your stories of people and situations? You stay present; you catch yourself in the act. Try that next time you talk to someone. Look at them and pay attention to the voices that arise in your head. What you'll notice is that your story about them will come up: what they did or didn't do to you, what they're wearing, who you think they are in the world, what other people think of them, if you think they are ugly or pretty, so on and so forth. Do you really think you are relating to them with all this noise in the background? You can’t. It’s impossible.
We create so many stories about people, places and objects that we see everything through a filter. It’s like those Claritin commercials: the image on TV is ever so blurry until the person has taken Claritin, and then the image is crystal clear. Think of how much brighter things would be if we saw them for what they were. Think of how much more colorful nature would be, how much better food would taste, how much more you’d be able to actually hear what people were saying. It would be a world through a crystal clear lens. You would free yourself from the prison of your mind and truly experience life!
It’s time to start relating to each other this way or you will miss our lives completely. Get out of your head, catch yourself in your story and commit to letting go of the labels and words associated with everything. Stay present and enjoy life. Living in the world of what IS instead of the world of LANGUAGE is so much more exciting. It’s a life without fear (the fears that you’ve created that don’t really exist anyway). Everyone deserves a life like that. It’s called freedom! It’s called presence. It’s called LIFE!
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 Written by: Betsy Karp
"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity."
- Gilda Radner
Wouldn’t it be so much easier if we all just let go and tried not to control the way we wanted our lives to turn out? I think it would. Lately I have just lived in the moment, being present and being me. I have never felt better. I don’t know the outcome of anything in my life right now--love, career, where I will end up--but I have faith in me and the choices I am making for myself. For the first time in a very long time, I can honestly say I am not trying to control anything. I am just letting life unfold in front of my very eyes. I’m actually a little surprised how I am enjoying all of this. Just being is pretty cool, if you allow it.
Yes, it’s important to have a plan and set some good intentions for what you want to achieve, but then you must have faith in yourself and the Universe, surrendering it all. The power of the universe is magical and miracles happen if you allow it. Actually miracles and opportunities are waiting for us everyday. We are the one’s that must open it up and let it happen. Where are you right now in your life? Are you controlling it or letting it go?
Try and let go and see what opens up for you. Step into uncertainty and look at it as a new adventure. Bring back the kid in you and just enjoy your life a little. Relax, let go, take a walk, do something kind for someone else, wear the color yellow and be sunny and cheerful. Bring positivity back in your life. A shift in perception is all you need to do this. If you lighten up and let go I bet you will be magically surprised as to what happens. Isn’t it time you lived your life with passion and purpose, expressing all you that you want and desire?
Make uncertainty your best friend. Be okay with not knowing what is going to happen, and let the miracles of life show you what it has in store for you. I would love to hear about all of those miracles.
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Hugs,
Betsy Karp,
Founder of i adore me
 Written by: Betsy Karp
It ‘s a new year and that means it is time for new beginnings, commitments and what we really want to create in 2013.
I really dislike the word RESOLUTION. I feel it is a word that just doesn’t work. We set out with all good intentions for our resolutions, however, by the middle of January, or if you are lucky enough to get to February, they are shattered and gone. I was listening to news the other evening and less than 20% percent of people keep their resolutions. The two biggest resolutions are: I am going to exercise more. And, of course, the REALLY BIG ONE…I am really going to lose weight this year…the notorious 10 pounds.
Instead of saying, “I have a resolution,” why don’t you possibly try saying to yourself, “I will make a commitment”? When we commit to a dinner date, we go. When we commit to a job, we show up. So where in your life can you commit to something that will help you create all that you want in 2013?
The first thing you need to do is to write down what it is that you want. Ask yourself, “What is it?” This is a bigger question than you think. Take time and really ask yourself, “What do I want to create in 2013?” Then make a plan. Nothing in life gets done without action. Action is what makes everything work. It’s a step-by-step process. Do things in baby steps. That is how things move forward. Nothing happens overnight. “Slow and steady wins the race.” I love that saying because life is a process. There are many successful people who say, “It took me YEARS to be an overnight success.”
We get to where we want by having a plan, making a commitment and honoring that vision. If you break your commitment, the only one you ever really hurt is yourself.
As we step into our commitments to ourselves we feel more empowered. It builds self-esteem and confidence. Make a commitment and create what you really want for yourself.
Step into your commitments with passion, a plan and action. I’d love to hear what your commitments are for 2013? Please share below.
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Hugs,
Betsy Karp,
Founder of i adore me
 Written by: Betsy Karp
This is your year to be totally honest with yourself and to tell the truth.
Your truth…
We all know deep within ourselves what that looks like, but somehow most of us our afraid to really reveal it. Start believing in the saying,“ the truth will set you free,” because it will. When we honor our true feelings, everything starts to shift. We can open up, be real and start moving forward with integrity. Ask yourself these questions: “Am I being honest with myself? Am I living in integrity? Am I telling my truth?”
I spent New Year’s Eve with someone from my past that I love very much. I was honest with my feelings, and myself, as well as with him. I have no idea where things will go and what will be, and how the Universe will intervene. Maybe we are just two passionate, loving souls sharing space and time in life. I really don’t have all of the answers yet. But what I do truly know is that it feels so great that I was honest with my emotions and myself. I told the truth. My truth. Life and love are complicated and yet when we are truthful with ourselves, everything seems to be a little simpler and a bit freer.
Let your heart steer you in the course you need to go in 2013. Trust that a pure heart will bring you just rewards. Look within and listen to your heart. The heart never lies. It is the truth. Don’t let your head bamboozle your every move. Our mind-voices can make us crazy and turn everything upside down.
Envision and create this New Year to be a year of honesty, and integrity with everyone in your life, but most importantly yourself. Adore yourself and tell your truth so that you can be the change YOU want to be in 2013.
*Please comment below and share with your friends.*
Hugs,
Betsy Karp
Founder of i adore me
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