Enjoy this video. I hope it inspires you as much as it inspires me.
Written by: EDWIGE GILBERT
Henry Ford once said, “Whether you believe you can or you believe you cannot, you are right." Fortunately the choice is yours. Unfortunately it is a very hard one to make. Let me tell you why. Most of the time you are not conscious that the decision you want to make has anything to do with embedded beliefs operating in your mind. There are two kinds of them, which I have named self-serving and self- sabotaging. The self-serving beliefs make you feel courageous, confident, happy and assist you in achieving your goals. On the other end, the self-sabotaging beliefs make you feel anxious, insecure and literally attack your self esteem and self confidence. In light of this awareness, if you feel good about yourself, are successful and in charge of your life, you have been blessed with the productive kind. No need to change anything, just make sure you show gratitude for your life and for all the people who live in it.
Let’s discuss now about what beliefs are and are not, and how you can make them work for you and become victorious. You see, a belief is just a thought that you hold to be true. That thought can trigger an emotion, which in turn can influence you to take an action, and it all ends up with a result. Let’s review this sequence again. There is a thought, followed by an emotion ending with an action and a result. It is a very important sequence to remember and not to take lightly, since the outcome may not always work to your advantage. That is the issue indeed. When you keep repeating the same unwanted sequence and getting the same result, you might want to stop and reflect for a moment. What is truly going on here? The problem might have to do with a thought which you hold to be true. What if you decided to challenge this belief and to question whether it is true or not? What about if you replaced your old belief? I promise, simply asking these simple questions can alter the course of your life in a very dramatic way.
Let me tell you my story:
As a little girl in the South of France, I was raised by a grandmother who believed that I was fragile and needed protection. Anytime I would venture out and try something new, I would hear “You cannot” and it would stop me immediately. Over time, with hundreds of repetitions of “I cannot,” I began to believe it so much that this phrase became my password, my worst companion. Even after I left grandmother and moved to the United States, I could still hear her voice deep inside my head, repeated anytime I wanted to show my courage and venture into the world. Not only did I feel I was cursed, but I also became very shy, without an ounce of self confidence, a true basket case. Maybe you can relate to my story or simply understand that it is meant to illustrate how a sabotaging belief can highjack your entire life. Ironically you start to believe that you are trapped. No matter what you try to accomplish, you return to the same place, to the same uncomfortable feeling over and over again. You are caught between your desire to take a positive action moving you forward, and your insidious belief holding you back. "Am I going crazy?" you ask. Are you doomed to remain a victim? Are you part of a Greek tragedy? I assure you it is none of the above.
Whether you have been struggling with your weight, hesitating to change careers, contemplating going back to the gym or giving up finding your significant other, the answer is the same. It is a three step solution.
The first step and most crucial one is to become aware. What I mean is to have the courage to reflect on your life and to trace back to the origin of your recurrent and uncomfortable feelings which are connected to your sabotaging beliefs. Let me warn you, from my experience, most of the time you will end up in childhood, which is when you will need to be kind, forgiving to yourself and others. Just know that you did the best you could. It was not your fault. You did what you were taught and the people in your life did their best as well with what they believed.
The second step of this transformational process is to imagine yourself free of the old belief, feeling confident, passionate unstoppable, moving forward towards your desired goal. To create this experience, begin to make vivid and compelling pictures of the New You that you project on your mental screen, see all the details of the person you desire to become and believe that you are worthy of feeling this way.
Step three is to declare your victory, as you immerse in rehearsing your role in this happy story. Then, when you feel you are at the peak of this emotional experience, take a deep breath and declare out loud “Victory to me, Victory is mine”. Believe that the seed of the New You has been planted and use repetition to ensure the creation of this new long lasting conditioning.
One important recommendation: be patient and be kind to yourself. It is believed that it takes a minimum of 21 days to install a new behavior in the subconscious mind. Be aware that some of those beliefs can be very tenacious, since they have been with you for a very long time. Whenever during the day you feel the unwanted feeling showing its face, simply make a fist with your right hand, take a deep breath and repeat silently to yourself three times in a row “Victory to me ,Victory is mine”. I promise it will activate the memory of your new experience and of the New You.
***Voila, give it a try and let me know your story!***
"We are not what happened to us, but what we choose to become"
Today YOU are writing this blog! I’m making YOU do all the work. For everyone who participates, I will give $10 off any session of your choice. Comment below and write 3 things you are grateful for and one act of kindness you will do for someone else today. I’ll start:
1. I am grateful for my assistant
2. I am grateful for the emotional support from my family
3. I am grateful for my friend Miriam who volunteered to help me at my big event at the FOF Beauty Bash
Act of Kindness: I am packing up some of my old clothes to send to my friend in California who had all of her clothes stolen from her car while she was moving.
(for a bigger challenge, do this for 21 days…it takes 21 days to make a change)
Last night at the JCC in Manhattan, I went to a meditation course on “The Color of Silence”. I was really intrigued and wanted to know what it all meant. I quickly learned that even silence has a color.
Color is my thing. I live, breathe and eat it, so I wanted to know more. Shalom, which means peace in Hebrew, was the name of our teacher (a very suited name for a meditation teacher). He had the coolest yarmulke (a Jewish hat) on his head made up of all different colors. The room was dark and ice cold with lots of blankets and pillows on the floor.
He first had us envision a color we felt fond of and/or connected to. I thought of the color green. Green makes me think of abundance, growth, grass and being outside in nature. We closed our eyes and I drifted off, imagining myself tossing and rolling in a sea of grass. I was enjoying myself, reminiscing of my childhood days of when I was just 5 years old. I felt so happy and free.
He then led us in a guided meditation of a blossoming rose garden. During the meditation, he asked us to pick our favorite color rose. He described all these beautiful colors ranging from soft cream to pale, to buttercup yellow, to shades of peach and apricot, and then to deeper tones of crimson and dark berry. I chose soft buttercup. I just love that color.
It was a very long meditation with some imagery, then moving on to pure silence. I found myself getting lost in the silence and completely still. It seemed to go on forever but the mediation was just 20 minutes.
What is really so wonderful about meditation is that it gets your emotions out of the way. It allows you to think and act clearly. It helps ground you and opens you up to new possibilities. It is so relaxing once you find your rhythm and get into the practice of it all.
There were 10 of us in the group. After we were done with the meditation, we went around the room describing what our color was and what it meant to us. One woman talked about the color peach. She had grown up on a peach orchard in California. One of her all-time favorite memories was of her grandfather letting her go with him on his daily route, picking peaches. She loved the smell, the taste and the color peach. It was a mixture of warm yellow and orange tones. The meditation brought her right back to that fond and playful memory of her childhood. She stated, “I came here tonight, because I was feeling so stuck in my life and this has made me feel free and happy!” Many of us chimed in, because we all agreed.
This exercise made us feel good about ourselves and helped us to feel free in our minds and in our thoughts. In order to create and manifest what you want in life, you must relax, breathe and meditate. You need to get clear on what it is that you really want.
So close your eyes, imagine your favorite color, and see where those thoughts bring you. What is your color? Maybe now you to can feel the color of silence! Doesn’t it feel great!
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