Written by: Betsy Karp

I was one of the speakers at the Joie De Vivre Circle I’ve been going to for years now, and I love them. They are intimate gatherings at lovely women’s homes on Fifth Avenue. I met Edwige Gilbert there five years ago. She’s the woman who started the circle back in 2001.  She is charming and I adore her French accent.  Over the years she has become a very dear friend. When I walked in, she said, “Betsy, let’s change the format this evening. Instead of us speaking to the group one-on-one, let’s bounce off of each other and see where it goes. Are you on board?” I said, “Yes!”

It was a wonderful forum of conversation, letting go and just being in the moment. We were a great complement to each other, bouncing back and forth with our stories and powerful words. Sometimes the best things happen when we don’t plan and expect everything to be perfect. Perfection! What a word. And if you’re not careful it can destroy you.

For so many years I wanted to have everything perfect in my world, but now the word perfect to me means that everything is perfect just as it is. I look at my life through such a different lens. I‘m not about getting or making things perfect. I am just being me and showing up, and it feels really great.

Edwige went around the room asking everyone one to share an experience about someone they love and how that experience had an impact on them.  It was so real and everyone opened up, speaking from their hearts.

A lovely gentleman in the group turned and said,“ Well here is my share. I was away on a trip with a very dear friend. I carry many of my business cards with me and I hand them out to anyone I meet. My good friend, who is a psychologist, turned to me and said, ‘Why in the world are you wasting those cards on people who probably will just throw them in the garbage after tonight?’  So I said, ‘I believe that it’s better to share the love and give the cards than to have them sit in a box in your house to collect dust.’ ‘Thank you for that…you are so right. I will start giving them out. I can’t thank you enough for that message.’”

One woman said, “I gave my daughter a magic wand many moons ago and I told her that the wand had three attributes and they are:

1) This wand will be your very own fairy godmother
2) It will work if you want it badly enough
3) AND It will work in it’s own time.

To this day my daughter says, ‘Mom, that wand was invaluable. You were so right, because it all does work out in it’s own time. Thank you!’”

We all chimed in with, “WOW, I wish my mother had given me a magic wand.”

Everyone has a story and I love the one of the magic wand. I am going to get my own magic wand and let it work it’s magic in it’s own time. How about you?

*Please comment below and share with your friends.*

Hugs,

Betsy Karp,
Founder of i adore me

There is a saying that it is better to give than receive. Whether you can give a little or a lot, giving is giving. Are you still searching for that perfect holiday present? How about sharing your appreciation and love? What could be better than giving someone the chance to experience self-love, catapulting them towards their dreams? Give them the gift of a happier, healthier life. Who doesn't deserve that?

***The person lucky enough to get this gift certificate from you will be able to use it towards any program of their choice listed on the work with me page. When redeeming this gift certificate, they will also get 20% off the total cost of the program(s) they choose.

Here is part two for the i adore me class I am teaching to 11 & 12 year old children for Citizen Schools. Through this course they are learning how to adore themselves, how color can impact their emotions and what that means for their community. The following are six short blogs by some of the students. They were asked what their passion is, what their favorite color is, how their passion and their favorite color makes them feel aWnd how they will use these things to support their community. The lesson here was to teach them how to express themselves through words. It’s interesting how a child’s mind works. We can learn a lot from them! They don’t edit themselves. I hope you enjoy their answers as much as I do:

Written by: Mansur Usman

My passion is that I want to be an artist to get money and play basketball. My favorite color is yellow. The reason why I pick that is because yellow makes me feel free and relaxed. The passion and the color makes me feel I am going to be a better person and be famous. I can use all of these to decorate my community and make it colorful. Or maybe the boys wants to play basketball or the girls want to be artists. And I could make my community a better place.

Written by: Leslie

My passion is counseling people. I love giving people advice. I’ve always loved giving advice. My favorite color is blue, because I love the way it makes me feel. It makes me feel secure. The way these things would help me support my community is that I could go do a big poster and I want it to be blue. I want the people to know that I’m creative…also what I’m capable of doing for my community. It’ll help them with their problems.

Written by: Merlin

My passion is to be a Marine. My favorite color is blue. It makes me feel safe and happy. I will help.

Written by: Marcel Daniel

My passion is being an artist and rapping. My favorite color is green, sage, because it makes me feel like I’m strong. I say it’s because my raps and drawings, and my color will change the world.

Written by: Mark Diaz

My passion is to play football and basketball. My favorite color is black. My passion makes me feel energetic. My favorite color makes me feel happy. A lot of people love black. I can also build football fields and basketball courts. They will be able to practice their dream.

Written by: Stephanie Porfil

My passion is playing Xbox Kinect. My favorite color is red and black. My favorite color makes me feel dark and bright. I will play games with kids who don’t have Xbox 360 to let them have fun.

*Please comment below and share with your friends.*

Hugs,

Betsy Karp,
Founder of i adore me

Right now I have a lot of hope in my heart. I have hope for our country. I have hope that we can move forward as a united nation now that the election is over. I have even more, positive hope that President Obama will do what he set out to do 4 years ago. I have hope that my dreams and my passions of i adore me’s success will come to fruition. I also have a deep hope and courage within myself to keep going, never giving up. What do you have hope for?

Please enjoy this video. I hope it will inspire you as it has in me…

*Please comment below and share with your friends.*

Hugs,

Betsy Karp,
Founder of i adore me

I am teaching a new i adore me coaching program to middle school students in the Bronx. There are a total of twenty-two enrolled in the class. As the students entered the room on the first day, all I heard was, “I really don’t want to be in this i adore me class. What is it anyway?” My heart dropped. I knew once I got them rocking and rolling they were all going to love it, however, it took a little longer than I thought. The kids were loud, unruly and they just didn’t want to listen. Then I took charge. I let go of the lesson plan and lived in the moment. I clapped my hands with a loud force and told the kids, “I have a personal story to tell you.” All of a sudden there was silence. Finally, I had their attention.

I began by telling them who I was and why I was here, as well as what I was going to teach them. I shared with them a personal story of when I was just eight years old and how I learned to oil paint. When I began the story there was silence once again.

“It was really late one night and everyone was sleeping. I crept downstairs while taking my colorful paints and all of my supplies. I stayed up all night painting and created a beautiful picture. I hadn’t even realized that so much time had passed. When it was almost light outside, I realized I had painted through the night. When you have a passion and you find something you love to do, you forget about time. My parents weren’t so happy with me the next day, because I was so tired. I didn’t want to go to school. My parents made me promise that the next time I wanted to paint I was going to have to do it after school or on the weekend…not on a school night. I agreed. I told them I loved to paint. It was my new passion.”

I continued to tell them about what I had done in my life so far and all of the companies I had worked for. When I mentioned Ralph Lauren, the kids screamed, “That is so wild, really you did?” They were mesmerized. I continued and told them that I even had my own line of clothes called Betsy Karp and I sold them in 75 stores. “Wow you are famous!” they yelled out.  “Not really,” I replied. “I want all of you to know that we really should never stop learning in life. I went back to school to get a second degree in my early 40’s.” “WOW,” they said. “No teacher ever tells us his or her age. How old are you?” I said, “I am 48 years old.” With excitement, they said, “You are the coolest teacher EVER!!!”

The lesson for the class was based on Passion, “What is your passion? How can you make your passion a reality? What are two of your passions that inspire you to do well in school and why?” These were big questions for middle school students, but they were grasping it. It was incredible. They were eating this stuff up.

I had their attention and it was time to teach them about PASSION, so I asked a few students, “could you please tell me what your passions are? What do you like to do after school? What makes you happy and makes you feel good?”

One of the students blurted out, “I have so much passion, I love to play basketball, and volleyball. I am a great, cool dancer too! When I get older I am going to be the next Michael Jordan.”

Another stood up and said, “My passion is helping my mom make dinner. I love to cook. It makes me happy and I love that we get to eat what I make.”

Their answers were precious. They understood the lesson so well and what it means to feel and have passion.  Maybe we should all take a look at how children view the world. They are so open, free and they live in the now. 

So I ask you, i adore me readers, what is your passion? Are you living out your passions in your life today? Are you happy? Maybe it’s time to look back in your life and find that thing that turned you on way back when. There is no time like the present. Let these children inspire you. What are you waiting for?

*Please comment below and share with your friends.*

Hugs,

Betsy Karp,

Founder of i adore me

Today YOU are writing this blog! I’m making YOU do all the work. For everyone who participates, I will give $10 off any session of your choice. Comment below and write 3 things you are grateful for and one act of kindness you will do for someone else today. I’ll start:


1.   I am grateful for my assistant
2.   I am grateful for the emotional support from my family
3.   I am grateful for my friend Miriam who volunteered to help me at my big event at the FOF        Beauty Bash

Act of Kindness: I am packing up some of my old clothes to send to my friend in California who had all of her clothes stolen from her car while she was moving.

(for a bigger challenge, do this for 21 days…it takes 21 days to make a change)

Hugs,

Betsy Karp

Now You…

The unknown can scare us half to death, not knowing what to expect, what we’re going to have, where we’re going to be and how our lives will turn out. But if we knew everything in advance, we really wouldn’t be in existence; life wouldn’t be life and it would be a complete bore. Life is a constant evolution process. It’s learning to deal with and accept the unknown.

The other day I was feeling a little overwhelmed taking a look back at where my life had been and what I had done. When I looked back at the things I had achieved over the years (which I didn’t know about year ago), it made me feel great. I felt accomplished with a year of growth. All of a sudden I felt so much better and so much lighter. I realized, “how could I know the unknown right now?” It’s impossible. And this is where the adventure and fun should come in.

If we take the fear out of the unknown and look at it more as a new path, a new direction or an adventure (and it’s all a lesson anyway), life will show us the way. The path will be paved. As a friend always says to me, “life takes care."
 
I am starting to date again and open myself up to new possibilities of meeting new people, and everything is unknown: When are they going to call? What are they going to look like? Are we going to connect? Learning about someone new can be exciting if we let it. But if I don’t jump into the unknown with a positive attitude, how will I find that new, special person?

The late Steve Jobs once said: “If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on.” I find this quote so true, because when we meet someone in life that just feels right, it feels like coming home. So don’t give up. Let the unknown be a good thing. Don’t give up on yourself and keep going until you find the person and/or thing you want. Your heart will know it when you find it.

Learn how to change your perception of the unknown, whether it’s relationships, starting a new job, your first speaking engagement or an audition. Look at the unknown as an awakening and an opening into a greater you. Let the unknown be your friend and keep saying yes to anything that comes your way. Be open, be ready and be willing to let the unknown become part of the known.

*Please comment below and share with your friends.*

Hugs,

Betsy Karp,

Founder of i adore me

Do you feel like you’ve got the weight of the world on your shoulders? When it feels like you’re being pulled down in every direction and you feel like you can’t breathe, take a deep breath, reach out and ask for what you need.

I was recently at a breakfast for Dress For Success at The New York Stock Exchange. It was an empowering group of over two hundred women and I was invited, because I had created a self-empowering i adore me coaching program for some of the Dress For Success girls. I taught them how to dress for success by using power colors to land their dream jobs. It felt great to be part of this event.

One of the keynote speakers got up and told her personal story of how her husband had gotten very ill with Leukemia and lost his job. She was the caretaker of him and their two boys and had to become the breadwinner of the family. She was loaded down and felt like she had the weight of the world on her shoulders. She became more overwhelmed when she was asked to head up a large program overseas with the company she worked for. She talked to her boss that morning and didn’t mean to break down crying, but the tears came. She said, “I need some help. There’s no way I can take on this responsibility right now with all the obligations I have of taking care of my family.”

She had no idea what to expect. She was just being herself and asked for what she needed. To her surprise, her boss said, “Why didn’t you come to me sooner with this? Of course we’ll work with you. What is it that you need?” She couldn’t believe her ears. He repeated himself by saying, “You’ve heard me correctly. What is it that you need? How can I help?”

The point of this story is that when we need something we need to reach out and ask for it. We need to feel the worthiness within ourselves to ask for what it is we need. When we start showing up and doing this for ourselves, that load and the weight of the world on our shoulders starts to dissipate.

As I was leaving the breakfast to go uptown, there was a fabulous musician singing the song “Lean On Me.” The synchronicity of it all just warmed my heart.

Wherever you are in your life right now, reach out, ask for what you need, ask for some help and feel worthy that you deserve to get that help. As the song says:

“Lean on me, when you're not strong
And I'll be your friend
I'll help you carry on
For it won't be long
'Til I'm gonna need
Somebody to lean on”
--Bill Withers

*Please comment below and share with your friends.*

Hugs,

Betsy Karp,

Founder of i adore me

Don’t you love to dream? What are you dreaming about right now? How many of your dreams have come true? What’s the next one on your list and how are you going to make that happen? Here are the 10 simple signs if a dream of yours is about to come true:

(taken from TUT…A Note from the Universe: theuniverse@tut.com)

10. You regularly visualize the end result, the after-party, or beyond.
9. Every day you “show up,” doing something about it.
8. You’re not attached to how it will come true.
7. It really matters to you; you really care.
6. You know who the first 3 people are that you’ll call with the news.
5. You’re smiling and winking way more than normal.
4. Sometimes you speak and behave as if it already has.
3. It probably doesn’t depend upon specific people.
2. You already know what your next goal is.
1. You keep whispering, “Sweet! Thank you! Yes!” with clutched fists.

I think the thing to contemplate about dreams is to ask yourself what it is you really want. And, do you BELIEVE you can really have what you want? And then you have to let it go and release it completely, with no attachments. The universe has a very funny way of showing up for how our dreams come true.

I was at a dinner party last evening and there was a lovely couple there. I always love to ask people how they met. The man chimed in, “I would love to tell you the story, because it’s a good one.”

This 65-year-old man decided to go on JDate. He had been divorced and decided after a few years that it was time to get back up on the saddle. The daughter of the woman who he is now married to, found him on JDate, reached out to him and told him that he had to take her mom out. She also said that he was in for the treat of his life and that this was the woman he was going to fall in love with.

The daughter emailed this man 3 days in a row saying, “Why aren’t you calling my mom? Why aren’t you acknowledging my emails?” After the fourth email, he decided “what the hell, I’ll try it.” He took her out on a Thursday and was in love by Saturday! He was telling me how she was nothing he wanted: she had two kids at home, was very recently widowed, she’s 5-foot-2 (he’s 6’4”) and it didn’t seem like it was going to be a fit. He said, “but let me tell you, she’s the dream of my life.”

What I love about all this is that we don’t know how the universe will make our dreams come true. But if we relax, open up, let go and let it do its magic, everything we want can come into our world. What’s your ultimate dream?

*Please comment below and share with your friends.*

Hugs,

Betsy Karp,

Founder of i adore me

I love the light the sky gives off in summer just before it turns dark. It's mysterious and somewhat magical. The skies are darkened, but there still is that glimmering of light shinning through, creating a silver lining.

Everything in life has a silver lining. Life is a journey filled with lessons along the way. You might have thought the lessons would be over once you grew up or graduated from college, but man they just keep on coming. So when we mess up, screw up, say the wrong thing, and/or do the wrong thing (which we all have at one time or another), is when life is saying, "you've got another lesson to learn."

When we start to open up and look at things from a different perspective (turning the negative into the positive, or turning lemons into lemonade), is when the silver lining shines through. It gives us hope, learning lessons from everything we do.

Start looking at things from a positive perspective and everything will shift. Don’t beat up on yourself as much. Take a deep breath and realize that you have something to learn. Feel better and don’t go into that panic or isolation place, blaming yourself…you have yet another lesson to learn.

Something that gets me crazy is when we do the same things over and over again, thinking we are going to get a different result. That just doesn't work. The lesson here is learning to understand why we keep repeating the same patterns. There is one pattern I am having a hard time with (an old relationship), but I'm getting better at it. It's about loving myself while being patient and setting my boundaries.

I had a very strange dream the other night that showed me a silver lining. I was on a crowded airplane and many people were wearing black hats (black is the color of death and funerals). My mouth was foaming with this white and green decay. It was disgusting, making me physically nauseous. It affected me so much that I woke up in a sweat. I haven't had one of those dreams in a long time.

I realized my dream was about someone in my life who just isn’t healthy for me anymore. The dream was telling me this relationship is decaying and that it’s time to let go and move on. Why is letting something and/or someone go so hard sometimes?  

My silver lining was telling me that it’s time to surrender. Being on the plane with lots of people was showing me that it is a reality I have to deal with in the physical world and not just my subconscious.

I got up in the morning, transcribed my dream in my journal and dabbed “Release” (one of my essential oils that contains Ylang Ylang, Geranium and Sandalwood) on a couple pressure points on my body: the back of my ears and my wrists. Putting essential oils on these pressure points help to release excess energy. I then followed my “Oils are Essential” program, where I use intentional meditations along with oils to move through my “stuck” areas. I felt so much better within a very short time.

I love writing these “Daily Insight” blogs (my dailies), and many people have been reaching out and thanking me for sharing them. On the other hand, some have unsubscribed to receiving them. When I first saw “unsubscribe” come up on my emails, I became upset and slightly offended. But I took a step back and reminded myself that I can’t please everyone, and that's okay. Pleasing everyone is not a realistic goal. And the same goes for you! Really, the only person that has to like you is YOU. All we can do is be ourselves and share our truth.

So here is my silver lining: Even if I help just ONE person feel better, it’s all worth it!

Remain open and ready, and share all of yourself with the world. Silver linings can be found every day. It’s about turning your dreams and your lessons into something positive. What's your silver lining today?

*Please comment below and share with your friends.*

Hugs,

Betsy Karp,

Founder of i adore me