Written by: Betsy Karp

"I wanted a perfect ending. Now I've learned, the hard way, that some poems don't rhyme, and some stories don't have a clear beginning, middle, and end. Life is about not knowing, having to change, taking the moment and making the best of it, without knowing what's going to happen next. Delicious Ambiguity."
- Gilda Radner

Wouldn’t it be so much easier if we all just let go and tried not to control the way we wanted our lives to turn out? I think it would. Lately I have just lived in the moment, being present and being me. I have never felt better. I don’t know the outcome of anything in my life right now--love, career, where I will end up--but I have faith in me and the choices I am making for myself. For the first time in a very long time, I can honestly say I am not trying to control anything. I am just letting life unfold in front of my very eyes. I’m actually a little surprised how I am enjoying all of this. Just being is pretty cool, if you allow it.

Yes, it’s important to have a plan and set some good intentions for what you want to achieve, but then you must have faith in yourself and the Universe, surrendering it all. The power of the universe is magical and miracles happen if you allow it. Actually miracles and opportunities are waiting for us everyday. We are the one’s that must open it up and let it happen. Where are you right now in your life? Are you controlling it or letting it go?

Try and let go and see what opens up for you. Step into uncertainty and look at it as a new adventure. Bring back the kid in you and just enjoy your life a little. Relax, let go, take a walk, do something kind for someone else, wear the color yellow and be sunny and cheerful. Bring positivity back in your life. A shift in perception is all you need to do this. If you lighten up and let go I bet you will be magically surprised as to what happens. Isn’t it time you lived your life with passion and purpose, expressing all you that you want and desire?

Make uncertainty your best friend. Be okay with not knowing what is going to happen, and let the miracles of life show you what it has in store for you. I would love to hear about all of those miracles.

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Hugs,

Betsy Karp,

Founder of i adore me

            Written by: Sutton Schuler

I am social, but very much so on my terms.  My independent nature can turn day in and day out, relationships into work. Although I love hosting a cocktail party, attending an intimate dinner, or just making small talk with the older couple sitting at the bar, I noticed I was declining invitations left and right.

And lets face it; there are those very chilly late December nights that are not conducive to going out, especially after a long week of work.  The last thing a lady wants to do is rush home to change, powder her nose, and re-heat a curl in her hair.  And this was just the case last December when I found myself on the phone with my mother, complaining about having a dinner invitation and lacking the energy.  She simply said, “Oh Sutton, just say yes and have fun!”

And with that, I bit the inside of my cheek, mixed a stiff drink, and committed to the required stages of primping. I figured a fun hairdo, along with the gin, would be a sure fire way to get me excited. Well it failed, and I was late to dinner.

But within five minutes of walking in the door, I was into another drink and in deep conversation with new and old friends. In between stories I sat back in my chair to observe the room. And at that moment I had to smile at myself for being so happy when just an hour earlier, I was dead set on a date with my pajamas and a movie.

It was one of those moments when I realized that at this point in my life, I will practically never say “yes” to something I would regret (except for that extra martini).  Whether it is dinner with friends, a long run in the park, or a trip to Brooklyn, I decided to just say “yes” to everything.

Once I made the conscious decision to do so, I realized just how often I was saying “no”.  My inner loner personality never wanted to commit to anything, because heaven forbid I would rather be doing something else, even if it was nothing at all. But at the end of the day, it is

Written By Steven Goldsmith

I have recently begun a process I started 6 years ago, awakening my inner-creative child. There have been many ups and downs along my creative path, and in recent years, much more downs than ups. Because of these downs, I fell into a deep, dark, disassociated sleep. Where was I to go and how would I wake up from this nightmare?

9 weeks ago was my breaking point…literally and figuratively. I had been pushing myself so hard that the universe decided to step in and break my ankle. This forced me to be with myself, be with my thoughts and give up control. I am a control freak by nature and not being able to do anything for myself was maddening. So why did this “break” happen? I just couldn’t figure it out.

Then, out of the blue, a friend reminded me of a process I began 6 years ago that I never completed, and it sparked something in me. It was “The Artist’s Way” by Julia Cameron, a 12-week process with lots of writing, exercises and self-reflection. I got through 6-weeks 6 years ago (how appropriate is that?), but couldn’t move past it. I am now on week 3 and loving where it’s taking me.

What I’m getting out of it this time is more awareness. I’ve grown as an individual in my artistry, but the vicious monsters in my head have grown in kind.  Somewhere along the line I lost my spark, my drive, my passion and my dreams. Somewhere along the line I lost ME. And now that ME is waking up from this nightmare, I see more possibility than I ever did before. There’s a deeper drive pushing me forward. I know that if I commit myself to this full 12-week process, I will be even stronger than I would have been had I completed it the last time.

I believe everything happens for a reason…good and bad! I am supposed to be on the journey I’m on right now, broken ankle and all. Someone wise (Betsy Karp) once told me that a broken bone represents something that is stuck in your spirit that needs to break free. This whole process has taught me that this is completely true. I needed a “break” from the direction my life was taking me.

It’s strange to think that something so painful could turn out to be so graceful and poignant. It made me stop and appreciate my friends, my family and my dog. It’s made me appreciate the life I’ve created for myself and the love and support that surrounds me. It’s made me be grateful for the clothes on my back, the roof over my head and the food in my refrigerator. Without this break, I don’t know that I would have given myself the gift of beginning “The Artist’s Way” again. Without this break I don’t think I would have appreciated all that I am. Without this break I don’t think I would have given myself the love and support that only I have the power to give me.

Now I’m not recommending you go out there and break your ankle, but it’s definitely a reminder that something seemingly horrible can turn out the be the best thing for you. Who would have thought that this “break” would remind me how important I am? As each day passes I appreciate and adore myself more. As I break through more and more layers of my slumber, I awaken to a much more loving world. It’s been a long time since I’ve been able to truly say and FEEL “i adore me,” and because of this accident, now I can. What could be a better gift than that?

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Are you feeling uplifted lately or are you down in the dumps? Who do you turn to when you’re feeling kind of blue? Who gives you that support and lifts you up? We all need support and it’s really important to find people we trust and that we can turn to when we feel sad and blue. So whom are you reaching out to? Who is your support system?

I find that when I’m feeling kind of blue and sad, I can call my best friend and say, “Hey, can I bitch for a second?” And then I’m begging her to make me laugh, because there’s nothing better in the world than laughing. It breaks you out of depression and makes you happier. It works every time. You instantly feel better.

Writing down my feelings and emotions helps to get them out as well. It feels like a therapy session and it's a lot cheaper. Possibly try doing that and see how you feel. Don’t suppress the feelings. Get them out in some way, whether you walk, exercise or laugh with a friend. Once you air it, somehow you feel lighter.

Then there is a wonderful universal law to try. Once you’ve gotten yourself uplifted to a more positive place, share your positivity with someone who is down in the dumps. Reach out and give that person a helping hand or a phone call…just show that you care. One of the greatest gifts you can give to someone is reaching out and saying: “I care.” You’ll lift them up as well as yourself.

Take one day at a time. Try as much as you can to be in the moment. Try not to fast forward to next week’s business conference. It is amazing how just by focusing on the moment, everything will take care of itself. Music is magic, turn it on. It shifts your vibration and energy helping you to be more in the now. We need to crawl before we walk and walk before we run, so don’t be in a rush. Take it as it comes, but keep on uplifting your energy and moving yourself in a forward direction.

Just like Gandhi says, “Be the change you want to see in the world.” It all starts with you. Take that first positive step. Then give back and get involved in helping others and your community. Whether you are a woman or a man, help extend the chain that links all of us together to heal. This is what community means: to share, support, help and give back! You will feel so good to get involved. Just look at how many lives you will help! Now that is what you call being UPLIFTED!!!

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Hugs,

Betsy Karp,

Founder of i adore me

The unknown can scare us half to death, not knowing what to expect, what we’re going to have, where we’re going to be and how our lives will turn out. But if we knew everything in advance, we really wouldn’t be in existence; life wouldn’t be life and it would be a complete bore. Life is a constant evolution process. It’s learning to deal with and accept the unknown.

The other day I was feeling a little overwhelmed taking a look back at where my life had been and what I had done. When I looked back at the things I had achieved over the years (which I didn’t know about year ago), it made me feel great. I felt accomplished with a year of growth. All of a sudden I felt so much better and so much lighter. I realized, “how could I know the unknown right now?” It’s impossible. And this is where the adventure and fun should come in.

If we take the fear out of the unknown and look at it more as a new path, a new direction or an adventure (and it’s all a lesson anyway), life will show us the way. The path will be paved. As a friend always says to me, “life takes care."
 
I am starting to date again and open myself up to new possibilities of meeting new people, and everything is unknown: When are they going to call? What are they going to look like? Are we going to connect? Learning about someone new can be exciting if we let it. But if I don’t jump into the unknown with a positive attitude, how will I find that new, special person?

The late Steve Jobs once said: “If you haven't found it yet, keep looking. Don't settle. As with all matters of the heart, you'll know when you find it. And, like any great relationship, it just gets better and better as the years roll on.” I find this quote so true, because when we meet someone in life that just feels right, it feels like coming home. So don’t give up. Let the unknown be a good thing. Don’t give up on yourself and keep going until you find the person and/or thing you want. Your heart will know it when you find it.

Learn how to change your perception of the unknown, whether it’s relationships, starting a new job, your first speaking engagement or an audition. Look at the unknown as an awakening and an opening into a greater you. Let the unknown be your friend and keep saying yes to anything that comes your way. Be open, be ready and be willing to let the unknown become part of the known.

*Please comment below and share with your friends.*

Hugs,

Betsy Karp,

Founder of i adore me

Everybody thinks fear is a bad thing, but actually it’s one of the best things that can happen to you if you use it to your advantage. Fear moves us forward, it helps us to grow, it pushes us out of our comfort zone and let’s us create new opportunities for ourselves. If we didn’t have fear we wouldn’t grow. And what would be the whole point of life anyway?

Everybody gets fear. Even Tony Robbins says he still gets it. But when fear does come up, ask yourself what you’re afraid of. What are those emotions and feelings? Let them come up inside of you…don’t push them down.

When you start to embrace and feel the feelings of fear, they will begin to dissolve. That’s what’s called pushing through the fear. This is something you really need support with, so look to a coach, a therapist, some of the i adore me programs and let fear be your friend instead of your enemy.

Just yesterday I had my sixth speech at Toast Masters. The topic was “Love or Fear. Which One?” I delivered a message through explaining how when we use fear to our advantage, it really does start to empower us, holding the love as its friend. Just let the darkness of the fear go. Even though it was my sixth speech and I am getting better at all of this, the butterflies and all the fears still came up for me that night and in the morning before the speech. But after I delivered the speech and people thanked me for a new, clever and creative way to explain the difference between love and fear, it brought about a resolution inside of me: I stepped out of my comfort zone, revealing things that I’ve been through that I had been fearful of, to try and help others.

Fear is a really big subject and emotion, but when we use it to our advantage and step out of our comfort zone and speak up and speak out, it starts changing how we feel. Where are you right now in your life? Are you in a fear-based place or a love based place? Maybe you need to let fear push you so you can grow. Use fear to bring about change in you and see how great you will feel after you do it. You really will feel like you’ve accomplished something. Start looking at fear in a whole new light, embrace it with some love, then let it go.

*Please comment below and share with your friends.*

Hugs,

Betsy Karp,

Founder of i adore me